A Long Blog Post About Being Black

My first blog of the year was supposed to be different.

I told my team we needed to revamp a few things and was SO excited to roll out a new tone and branding. But, I couldn’t let THIS week go by without sliding in your inbox.

Here’s the thing…

I’m Black.

Unapologetically.

Blackity – Black – Black – Black.

I was six years old when I was told “I don’t play tetherball with Black people” by a classmate. I told a Paraprofessional and we ended up going to the Principal’s office where buddy vehemently denied his statement with the waterworks and everything. They could have given this boy an Oscar for his performance!

I remember saying sternly to the Principal, “He’s a Storyteller!” (because of course I couldn’t say “liar” growing up) and looked her right in her brown eyes. Her blonde, curly hair brushed against her red power suit as she looked from me to him and back at me.

And that’s when I saw it flash: the look of doubt. It wasn’t that she didn’t believe me but it wasn’t as if she didn’t believe him either.

Even at six years old, I knew where it was going.

He got a verbal slap on the wrist and a threat to call his parents. Although a seasoned Paraprofessional advocated for my story and my character, he was allowed to return to class.

Without knowing the phrases “white privilege,” “male privilege,” or “white supremacy” I experienced all three…in elementary school.

I can recount numerous times where I was made to feel like being Black and ______ was a problem. Black AND smart. Black AND female. That “Black and” makes many people uncomfortable. I’ve bared the brunt of that discomfort right here in the same country that my ancestors built for free while being stripped, whipped, starved, sold, raped, isolated, infected, chained, beaten and killed.

I am aware of the resiliency that runs through my veins and the deep rooted racism intertwined within the fibers of this country. I am not going to sugar coat and act as though it’s easy to push out encouragement when you see people deliberately trying to stop you and others who look just like you. Sometimes I just want to mind my business and be quiet. However, I’m not wired like that. I am unequivocally proud of the skin I’m in and the voice I have. I am humbled that God saw fit to form me this way.

I’ll continue to share my journey as a “Black AND _____” in spite of the civil unrest. Scratch that, due to the civil unrest.

I won’t stop because I don’t know whose watching.

When I was in college, a young Black woman came up to me in the student center and said, “I saw you post your straight A’s online and said ‘If Vannesia can do it, I can too!'” Seeing the hope on her face was everything and I could physically feel her own resilience resurrecting as a Black student struggling to succeed academically at a PWI. It made me proud that six year old Vannesia stuck to her guns in that Principal’s office – regardless of the consequences or lack thereof.

The duality of being “Black AND successful” is something that I don’t think the 1% of the wealth holders of the country can fathom. They may even consider it an oxymoron.

But…it’s not up to them.

It’s up to you.

It’s up to me.

It’s up to the actions of awareness and allyship that we take every day to advocate for voices who aren’t yet represented in the rooms we’re in.

I’m not sure when we’ll experience a “government of the people, by the people, and for the people” that actually includes ALL people. However, I’m going to continue to walk in my purpose and lift my voice the best way I can and I encourage you to do so as well. Just like the young lady who stopped me in the student center, others will feel their own resilience rise from the ashes because of what you do and share.

The original goal of starting an email community was because I needed a way to send out my guest blog features instead of texting. However, so much has happened since I started guest blogging over six years ago – my business and podcast (here and here) didn’t even exist then. I wasn’t teaching at an HBCU and hadn’t started my business program yet. With this growth, I want to be clear about how I intend to use this space:

I will continue to write about my small businesses, your big dreams, and all Black lives. I am a Christian and a preacher’s kid, so Jesus will be mentioned, and so will phrases like “Turn to ya neighbor and say…..”. I’m a proud Millennial, and cultural references will be a part of that. I’ve had some research and book contributions published, so data will also creep its way in. These probably won’t be weekly messages as they have been in the past, but I commit to popping in at least one time each month. I pray the side effect of you reading these messages is that you laugh a little and are encouraged to believe in yourself.

If that sort of thing sounds good, I invite you to reply back with any topics you would like to hear my perspective on so I can make sure I cover it. I love when I get to hear from you.

If our journey ends here, I truly thank you for being part of this chapter.

Until we chat again, stay safe and stay true to who God has called you to be.

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